Levels

Stupidity, like the Inferno, contains levels, each worse than that before.

Some years ago, an artist created a bull sculpture and left it in the middle of Wall Street in the dead of night. After some debate it was kept and moved to the north end of Bowling Green. Tourists like to pose with it, like to photograph it, and, based on where the bronze is shiniest, like to fondle its scrotum.

Because of some random threat and/or paranoia, the police erected a barricade around the bull during the Occupy Wall Street encampment last fall. Apparently, there were credible and immediate threats to the safety of the sacred animal. Because a barricade prevents nothing, the police have a seemingly-permanent presence nearby.

This morning I had to go to my office for ten minutes to retrieve some paper I left on my desk. As I walked by the bull, there were some thirty tourists jockeying for position for the perfect photograph. Since the sidewalk is narrow and made narrower by the barricades, most of them were in the street.

The cop in the car got on her bullhorn* and told the tourists that they were creating a safety hazard and had to immediately get back on the sidewalk.

I was gone – into the subway – before the arrests, SWAT teams, and napalming commenced.

*Heh.

The “Luxury” Mentality

“Luxury,” as an adjective, is effectively meaningless. What makes a Cadillac a luxury car? Their ads say it is, so it is. Meaningless words do not, in themselves, annoy me much although they do provide fodder for endless meaningless chatter. Since I try to avoid listening to such chatter, my response is a resounding “meh.”

The problem is that some people – If I’m being honest, I’d say I believe that the topic at hand is “stupid people” – think that their asses deserve kissing because they bought something labelled “luxury.”

Chez__B was originally an office building constructed as a money-making venture by the bank that occupied the large first-floor space. The grand entrance off the street leads to the bank hall, with a smaller entrance down the block leading to the elevators for the other floors. As part of the residential conversion, a vestibule was installed at the elevator entrance (now the residential lobby) with a door at the street wall and a door about seven feet inwards at the interior lobby wall. (The seven feet is obviously not solid wall, but is where one of the emergency stairs is located.) During the four years we’ve lived in the building (we were among the first residents after the conversion was complete), the interior door of the vestibule has almost never been closed. It is propped open, effectively permanently. Two other physical facts of note: the concierge desk is immediately adjacent to the inner door and it is equipped with a closed-circuit TV that shows the sidewalk outside the outer door. The TV allows the concierges to see if they have to go to the door and help someone.

The other thread of this story comes via Google Groups. The residents established a group before we moved in for general building discussion. I joined and lurk. I don’t participate because reading the comments there quickly convinced me that my fellow tenants are largely a bunch of entitled, whiney yuppies and hipsters. A common refrain is “Why is such-and-such true IN A LUXURY BUILDING?!?” A recent thread discussed spending somewhere in the high five figures to reconfigure the lobby because the concierge desk was very cold during the winter.

Yesterday, I asked one of the concierges why he didn’t close the inner door, since treating the vestibule as an actual vestibule would do a great deal towards stopping cold drafts at his desk. His response was that people had complained of difficulties with baby carriages or shopping carts when the door was closed. In other words, the extra couple of seconds it takes the concierge to help an encumbered person when both doors are closed had spawned enough complaints that he was sitting there in the cold. Because IN A LUXURY BUILDING twelve seconds to get through the door is unacceptable when ten seconds is possible.

The core of my profession, the core of engineering design is making tradeoffs between various goals. Less expensive up front means more maintenance. More functionality means more complex controls. Better looking means more expensive. And so on. The people in my building believe that their sense of luxury outweighs the human comfort of a half-dozen men – their employees – who they see every day. I wish I could say it’s just this building, but judging by the people I meet in my work and what I see of national politics, it’s not. Fuck them all and fuck their luxury.

Not To Mention The Spitting

So, a bunch of assholes have decided to send missionaries to NYC. This is not the first time and won’t be the last, but there are a few points worth mentioning:

  • Get used to hearing the words “Fuck you, asshole.” You’re planning on going up to strangers and telling them you know more about them than they do – this is the nature of missionary work – and unlike people where you’re from, New Yorkers are not taught as children to be polite to salesmen.
  • Be honest about your goals. NYC is not without religion, it is without a dominant religion. Your main goal is not to convert heathens but to steal people from other Christian sects. In short, you’re playing the same role as Walmart.
  • Your sect only exists because your ancestors were so strongly pro-slavery that they needed to break off from their church and found one that catered to their prejudices. Don’t be surprised that people haven’t forgotten this.
  • Other groups have tried. The Mormons have a church on Lincoln Square and they apparently still haven’t figured out why their 20-year-old missionaries wearing nametags that say “Elder” are figures of fun on the streets. Operation Rescue has tried here several times and caused less disruption than the average weekend of sports. One of the noisier groups, the Westboro Baptist* Church found themselves a repeated punchline in Brooklyn.
  • Maybe instead of worrying about whether or New Yorkers attend a church you approve of, you should worry about yourselves.

*There’s that word again.

The Picture Doesn’t Match

First, Monday’s fog, click to engorge:

Now that you’re in a good mood, let’s discuss assholes. Amazingly, the Supreme Court got this one right (by doing nothing) and NYC’s decision to not allow religious use of public schools has been upheld. Context: there are something like 1100 public school buildings in the city, almost all with auditoriums and (obviously) all with classrooms that can be used as meeting rooms. To the lawyer for the church who got all butthurt that the schools are rented on the weekends for other, secular uses: those uses don’t exclude any kids. When your church uses a school and advertises that fact around the neighborhood, every kid who does not belong to your sect is told that he or she is an outsider in their own school. They are not excluded by Law & Order filming there, or AA having a meeting there.

To put it another way, churches are already given huge (and, IMO, unfair) tax advantages. If you can’t manage to rent a space without public help, maybe your god is a fucking loser.

No Erection Jokes, Please

The Washington Monument is pretty much the poster child for a design that will perform badly under seismic loading: heavy, brittle, and slender. The August 23rd earthquake in Virginia damaged the monument sufficiently for it to be closed to the public.

(Click to engorge.)

I dunno…maybe DC could use a ruin more than a repaired monument. It could remind us of where we’re headed.

Moronic Twit

Meghan McCain shows off the depth of her analysis.

Where to start? First, Ms McC, given the number of people who have already called you a “dumb blond,” I would have thought you’d be a little clearer on the downside of casual stereotyping. I realize you’ve led a sheltered life, but there’s more to Brooklyn than whatever hipster bar you went to in search of…whatever.

Second, Brooklyn’s population is 2.5 million. In round terms, zero percent of them look and act like Ms. Deschanel. Some do of course, but one percent would be 25,000 manic pixie dream girls and I’d have noticed a phenomenon that annoying.

Finally, let’s discuss devolution. Your father was given multiple chances to fuck up in the military because his father was a big shot, which makes you (like G W Bush) a rare example of two generations of breeding for the trait of failing upwards. If your father and the corporate big wigs who own him have their way, the dispossessed may engage in real violence in this country and being a spokesperson for the vapid children of privilege might be a bad idea. You see, as a liberal I don’t want anyone hurt, not even morons like you.

Public Safety

By now, everyone has heard the official explanations of the way Zuccotti Park was cleared. The fact that a police helicopter has been hovering over West Street for two days (fucking well visible and audible from my office window) is proof of the level of bullshit we’re dealing with: the cops apparently need air support – in addition to their body armor, trucks, mini-dozers, and garbage trucks – to roust a bunch of hipsters who have a hard time dealing with the line for the McD’s toilet. Mikey B has in some ways been a decent mayor by any standards, but he has a strong authoritarian streak and, let’s face it, he’s the poster child for 1% privilege.

We’ll see what happens. “Protecting public safety” has been used as an excuse for a lot of unsavory violence.

A Random Thought

As I sit here in the office on Sunday, trying to catch up with all the crap that built u while I was in Minneapolis, I’m listening to my “mellow” mix in one ear and the OWS drummers in the other.

Zuccotti Park is not on Wall Street. One end is at Liberty and Broadway, two short blocks north of Wall Street’s west end. What Zuccotti Park is, is across the street from the WTC site. (The southeast corner of the WTC site, to be exact, where the once and future 4 WTC is located.) So…would OWS have the same emotional resonance if it were not across the street from an obvious symbol of all that was wrong with the GWB administration?

Randomness

The best thing to come out of staying in a mediocre hotel in Pittsfield is that I discovered Chris Hayes has a morning tv show on MSNBC. Being a politics geek, he created a show that is remarkably similar to a graduate-school discussion group. He has one right winger on the panel per show, and those people have reliably been flaming assholes, but most of the discussion has been at an almost adult level. On regular tv. Amazing.

Also, all is not bad here. Sunrise over the berkshires:

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Occupy My Office

We’ll all find out where the Occupy movement is headed. The history of the U.S. suggests “nowhere” as an answer, but we might get lucky. The Progressives got some of what they waned 100 years ago and the combined mass movements of the 60s got some, too.

I agree with the main point(s) of the movement; I agree with maybe 95% of the minor points. I’m seriously considering investing in some mylar blankets and handing them out in Zuccotti Park, as a friend did last week with first-adi kits.

Meanwhile, it’s about 80 feet horizontally (and 150 feet vertically) from the park to my office window and the fucking drums are driving my insane. Unfortunately, it’s around a corner, so I can’t throw apple cores at them.

Update, 11:50 AM: So far today, no drums. We do have a bagpiper playing, and he began his concert with “A Bicycle Built For Two.” You haven’t lived until you’ve heard that song on the pipes.

Update 1:14 PM: The drums have started. Someone who wandered down that way reports that it was a female bagpiper, which is a rare thing.

I Knew It

I served on a grand jury last December for two weeks, listening to an endless stream of very young ADAs talking about how various people needed to be indicted. Given the evidence that was presented, I generally voted for indictment, particularly for violent crimes. The exception was I typically voted against indictments for drug possession based solely on an undercover cop’s testimony. Those cases all seemed vaguely fishy…and it turns out I may have been on the right track.

Templeton, Come Home

This is a left-over from the rattus-rattus-fest two weeks ago.

NYC is a union town, and the construction trades are one of the centers of union strength. A couple of decades ago, someone came up with the idea of protesting non-unions construction sites with inflatable rats. BIG inflatable rats. I’m not sure if they originated here and then spread elsewhere or vice versa, but they’re all over the place now.

The rats have evolved over the years. I first noticed female rats about ten years ago, and there have been a fair number of facial variations.

One of the tamer styles (click to engorge, you damned furries):

 

Delusions of Normality

I mentioned a christian fanatic a few days ago, so let’s discuss some jewish fanatics. A group of flaming assholes decided that since (1) a large percentage of people in their neighborhood are also fanatics, (2) god sez women are inferior, and (3) they’re too chickenshit to enforce their own idiotic rules, that the thing to do was put up signs regarding use of the public sidewalks.

These are, of course, the same assholes who decided that outsiders shouldn’t be able to bike through their neighborhood.

No Clue

Another asshole who needs to starve in the gutter. I could discuss the logical flaws in her arguments (other people also have rights, everyone gives up some portion of freedom of action and speech at their job, and so on) but what’s the point. Her hateful bullshit is the logical conclusion of thirty years of evangelicals and other morons taking the position that their beliefs are the equivalent of rational thought and the Republican party encouraging them as a way to get votes. It’s the enlightenment in reverse and I don’t see any logical argument that will be half as effective as mockery.

Location, Location, Location

Something that may not be obvious to non-NYers about Occupy Wall Street: lower Manhattan is a small area. The center of the protests is “Zuccotti Park” – otherwise known as the plaza that U.S. Steel had to build to satisfy zoning when it constructed the building now known as One Liberty Plaza (165 Broadway, actually a very short block away from Liberty Street) – which is diagonally across Broadway and a couple of blocks north of Wall Street. The plaza is, in recent years, most famous for being across Church Street from the southeast corner of the WTC site.

Incidentally, my office is one very short block south of the plaza, facing Wall Street in one direction and Church Street in the other.

This may all seem meaningless, and perhaps it is, but the fact is the protestors have spent very little time on Wall Street (because of the police presence) and quite a bit more on the less-bankster-populated west side of Broadway. But everything in the Wall Street area is within a five minute walk – the WTC, the bull statue north of Bowling Green, the yuppie scum bars over by the South Street Seaport, City Hall, a half-dozen buildings that briefly were the tallest in the country a century ago, and a sprinkling of AEC offices for seasoning.


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Digithead Women

Engineers live up to some of the stereotypes about us. Sometimes they seem to revel in it. I’ve worked with engineers who were racist, sexist, xenophobic, and incapable of n0n-linear thought…and damned proud of all of it.*

Sexism is arguably the most pernicious of the engineer stereotypes. A lot of engineers are willing to say amazingly stupid things about the role of women in their profession and in society. This discussion has barely advanced from “girls’ hair would get caught in machinery if we let them in”. When I was an undergrad at an old and storied engineering school, women were roughly 20% of my class. 25 years later, it’s about 24%.

If I start from the basis that intelligence and a willingness to work hard are gender-neutral traits – an assumption based on a great deal of empirical evidence and a great deal of scientific research – then I quickly reach the conclusion that there’s no reason to make gender-based assumptions about engineers. If I do something much easier and look at the various people I’ve worked with for the past 25 years, I come to the conclusion that women are over-represented among the better engineers. There may well be social reasons for this: it is possible that engineering as a career is a step up for a lot of women, while it is seen as a low-class trade by a lot of men.**

We’re hiring right now, looking for a young engineer with up to four or so years of experience. I’ve read about sixty resumes, most of which were depressing: people not qualified for the position or with more experience than me. Of the four that we have set aside as possible interviews, three are women and three are non-white. Maybe our small company isn’t appealing to white male engineers. Maybe a medium-status, medium-wage, high-pressure profession isn’t appealing to white males. Or if I wanted to use the logic of the bigots, I could argue that the resumes are proof that white males are less qualified, but somehow I don’t think argument would fly.

*I am excluding “software engineers” – who usually have degrees in computer science – from this discussion because (1) I don’t know any personally, (2) I don’t consider them to be engineers because there is usually no non-economic cost to a failure of one of their designs, (3) given the actions of their lunatic fringe on various internet forums I have frequented, they are beyond parody.

**This is a US phenomenon. Engineers seem to get somewhat more respect elsewhere.

Being a Boss

My great-uncle M – picture a short, stocky troll-looking man with a heavy Russian accent – gave me some advice once based on his fifty years as a labor organizer: “There’s two people you shouldn’t be. Don’t be a lendlord and don’t be a bus.” Somehow, here I am, a bus with seven employees.

I’m not going to claim it’s tougher being a boss than being an employee. That’s obviously bullshit and insulting to just about everybody who works for a living. However, there is one issue that may be difficult to appreciate if you’ve never been a boss and assuming that you have a conscience: the pressure of having to be right. Including children and unemployed spouses there are 11 people who depend onĀ  my partner and I being right. We’re trying to do things right: we pay for health care for our employees and their families (and use the same program ourselves), we don’t have a limit on sick days, we allow flexible hours, we try to create a decent working environment, we pay competitive salaries, and so on.

If I screw up (or my partner screws up) badly enough, we’re going to hurt some of those 11 people. And whether or not you believe I have a conscience, working in a one-room open office means that I wouldn’t be laying people off via email or memo. If I screw up enough badly enough that we can’t make payroll for the foreseeable future*, I’m going to look someone I’ve been working with for years in the eye and tell them they’re fucked.

All the crap coming our of DC about “job creators” won’t do a thing for us, despite the fact we’ve added a full-time and a part-time position since the downturn started. We’re too small and too poor** to get any of those benefits or to have the Koch-suckers care about us. All my partner and I get for our effort to hire is more people to worry about.

*Since the downturn started in the fall of 2008, there have been more payroll cycles where my partner and I didn’t immediately deposit our own paychecks than ones where we did. It’s the easiest way to smooth out cash flow, and a constant reminder of how fragile things are.

**Our total income this year will be somewhere around $900,000. Our profit will probably be less than $30,000.

The More Things Stay The Same, The More Things Stay The Same

Near the end of the Beggar’s Opera, John Gay has his protagonist Macheath thinking about the unfairness of his sentence:

Since laws were made for every degree,
To curb vice in others, as well as me,
I wonder we han’t better company
Upon Tyburn Tree;

But gold from law can take out the sting;
And if rich men like us were to swing,
‘Twould thin the land, such numbers to string
Upon Tyburn Tree!

In other words, the politics of 1728 are still true.